Sunday, June 28, 2015

July 1999


It was a month after Jacob died. Hannah was six months old. We were spending a hot and humid few days in the Berkshires with our extended family. Jeremy and I took Hannah to the beach to splash around. We were walking her in the stroller back to the house.

We recognized a car that belonged to one of Jeremy's siblings. It may have been a rental.  It was stuffed to the gills with children, parents and stuff. It was a right squeeze-up in there. In this state it reminded me of one of those clown cars you see at the circus. It sped by us. It seemed like they didn't see us. Or maybe they were in a hurry.

We arrived at the house to greet Jeremy's dad who was there by himself. My mother in law was playing tennis. Hannah fell asleep in her stroller. We wheeled her into a quiet room so she could finish her stroller nap.

Jeremy's dad seemed confused. Why aren't you at the pool party? He asked.

Jeremy and I were mystified. What pool party?

My father in law looked annoyed. They didn't tell you about it? We shook our heads. The three of us sat down at the dining room table. Jeremy's dad proceeded to decant pills and vitamins into shot glasses.

After a few minutes he said, they really should have invited you.

Jeremy said that he wasn't sure he wanted to go to a pool party anyway.

The three of us sat quietly for a few more minutes. One of the things I like about most men is that they don't always feel the need to fill in the silence with chatter.

I think I know why they didn't invite us I said. My father in law looked up. We locked eyes. We both looked at Jeremy who was reading the newspaper.

We all went back to what we were doing. The decanting. Jeremy started the crossword puzzle. I continued sitting in the chair and staring vacantly.

After a few more quiet minutes I said, I could be wrong. Maybe I'm reading too much into it.

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